An Ultimate Demise

Yesterday why my wife was meandering through one of those bed, bath and various home accessories places (the kind that has that smell that gives most men headaches) I decided to slip away and head over to the Ultimate Electronics next door.

Ultimate has had a run of bad luck lately (being bankrupt with a stock worth .15 cents does damper morale) but they do have cool stores with a lot of cool products. The Ultimate in my neighborhood is a beautiful store that has all the things that we men tend to desire. Loud things that take a PhD from CalTech to install and burn so much electricity that you have to petition your local utility for a nuclear power permit.

Despite the full parking lot, there were not a lot of folks in the store. Maybe a handful of shoppers and a ton of employees. MEMO to Ultimate management (of course they read this everyday) one of your problems might be the fact that none of your employees will help people. Actually having sales people that sell stuff might help the stock price.

Anyway, I was actually their to buy my wife something she wanted. A portable stereo for her desk at work. The one I suggested (the big and loud one that shakes your fillings) was shot down. I had to find the dainty piece that any self respecting man would mock me incessantly for possessing.

I wandered aimlessly passing several employees too busy doing God knows what but I was certainly not a priority. Then it hit me. I realized why the employees were so busy, so focused on their task. They were redecorating the store. Yes right in front of me (in the area where the dainty stereo presided, thankfully it was out of stock) was a poster of Ultimate's former CEO, the great Dave Workman. Only the poster had been made over by the busy employees. This poster featured Dave with his trademark smile and his not so famous devil's mustache, beard and horns. Yes, I'm not making this up. Plain as day, Dave Workmen in a full devil's look, in front of all of the customers (all five of us) to see.

I guess that pretty much says it all. You just can't make it up. When people know the ship is sinking there is little allegiance to the captain. I suppose it is hard to blame the employees for acting that way. But I'm left to wonder more important things. Like how I can talk my wife into that cranium splitting sound system...